How Many Ninja Assassins Does It Take To Kill A Ninja Assassin?

Ninja Assassin (2009)

Directed By: James McTeigue

Written By: Matthew Sand and J. Michael Straczynski

Why are you reviewing this? It's not horror, is it? Well reader let me explain. 'Ninja Assassin' is not a horror movie at all. It is most definitely a balls to the wall action movie. Why is it being reviewed on a horror website you ask? Here is my reason: 'Ninja Assassin' is THE BLOODIEST MOVIE I HAVE EVER SEEN. Yes, it is bloodier than Peter Jackson's 'Dead Alive'. This movie's biggest downfall however is its selling point. The blood and gore effects are ALL done in CGI. There are occasional props and squibs used here and there, but for the most part, it's all done with computers. If you have read any of my other reviews, you will know that CG blood is my BIGGEST pet peeve when it comes to horror films/films in general. Anyways, 'Ninja Assassin' is about a man raised by a secret ninja society who goes rogue after disobeying his leaders orders. Now, he is constantly on the run from his former ninja clan and other ninjas hired to kill him. While being on the run, he vows to protect those being hunted by his old clan in order to get closer to his former leader and rid the world of him once and for all. Basically, he is being chased while doing some of his own chasing. For the first 45 minutes of this movie, we flashback to Raizo, our ninja hero, an get a glimpse of the intense training he went through in order to become a master ninja. After the flashbacks, we are treated to one of the most balls to the wall action movie of this decade. Blades, Shurikens, and body parts fly all over the screen as Raizo fights off what seems like millions of ninjas constantly swarming him. I really wish they just used fake blood instead of using CGI, because all of the action sequences would have looked so much cooler and so much more brutal. It just became cheesy after a while. But, times is hard and CGI is easier and less time consuming. Overall, 'Ninja Assassin' was fucking awesome. The only reason why it's getting the score that it's getting is because of the excessive use of CGI blood and gore. 'Ninja Assassin' gets a 7/10.